Try Again

by ahthompson

So, I fell off the wagon and I mean WAY off. (Skipping breakfast, eating fast food for lunch and dinner and water? What water?) The culprit? Stress, of course. I’m sitting here right now trying to figure out why I can be consistent with everything and I mean everything else in my life, but when it comes to taking care of myself, I’m can’t. I mean, I consistently go to work, pay my bills, write, publish, and market my work, take care of my daughter and my home. If my two adult children need help, I’m right there. I do these things without even giving it a second thought. But for some reason, I just don’t consistently take care of myself. What the freak is that about?!


As I sit here right now, typing these words, a thought occurs to me. Maybe my role of being everything to everyone is the problem. For so many years I was the sole parent and sole breadwinner and sole decision-maker and that coupled with the necessity for me to be selfless at all times is at fault. Maybe I’ve spent so many years putting the needs and concerns of others before my own that I’ve forgotten how to take care of myself.


Ok, so what does this mean? Well, I’ve decided that I’ve got to change this. Even if it means getting to work late or falling behind deadline with my publishing work, or (gasp) just saying “no” sometimes when someone needs me for something, I’m going to take care of ME. I’ve got to, My life depends on it.


Is there anyone out there with the same problem? I call it Selflessitis (a chronic condition in which one gives so much of themselves they forget how to take care of themselves)