Wishing, Hoping, Praying

by ahthompson

I broke down today while watching The Voice on HULU. Crazy, huh? I just broke into tears at the most random moment. The singing was great. I was enjoying it, and as the song ended, the tears came.

I’m tired, y’all, and I’m stressed the freak out. I’m having to make some tough decisions about my future and I’m scared to death–paralyzed with fear. This is one of those days when I wish I had someone to share my responsibilities with. I wish I had someone, anyone, who would say,” Don’t worry about this–I got it.”  But I don’t. I’ve been divorced since 1999 and the relationships I had thereafter were horrible,and that’s being nice about it. My family members have their own responsibilities. so they can’t help–at least not the way I need them to.

I just want to write. That’s all I want to do.

I wish that someone would walk up to me and say, “You’ve worked hard to raise your kids. You’re a good person–not perfect, but good. And you’re a great writer. Take this money and take a break. Just write for a while…and rest.”

Wouldn’t that be nice? Rest. Rest for my mind, my spirit, and my heart. Wouldn’t that be so nice?

Oh, well, maybe one day. 🙂

I’m through whining now. Back to your regularly scheduled programming.