I quit…my job!!
I quite my job to pursue my writing career full time. I have to say that it is one of the best decisions I have ever made–hands down. I am not experiencing nearly as much stress. I don’t dread getting up in the morning. I love me job, now, and I am a much more patient person.
Everything is peaches and cream–or not.
True I am suffering from far less stress, but there is still stress in my life. Self-imposed stress. Now my well-being and the well-being of my family depends solely and entirely on the number of books I sell. The realization of this makes me want to do nothing but work harder and harder and harder.
And that is what I’ve been doing–day and night. Almost endlessly. No matter what time I wake up, I get up and go right to work. Well, I do read my Bible and pray first. But after that, my work day begins, But the problem for me is that I tend to plow through my work. I have this weird disorder that makes me feel like I have to finish things in one sitting.
So I work until it’s time to shower and take my daughter to school and then I return home and work. I keep bathroom breaks to minimum–they just slow me down. I try to remember to get up and stretch my legs, but when you’re on a roll writing or a new idea has hit your brain, who has time for breaks? Generally, I work and work and work until either my bladder is about to burst or I’m about to pass out from exhaustion or…I’m so hungry I can no longer think straight.
Yes, people. You read it right. I have been forgetting to eat! Me! The chronic and committed over eater has been forgetting to eat. And when I don’t forget, I just postpone it until I’m done with whatever I’m doing. But the problem with me is that I’m never done. Most of the time it is hard for me to shut my brain off.
After years of thinking only of eating, one might think at first that this would be a welcome change for me. Well, no, because, not eating leads to fluctuations in you blood sugar and you need that sugar for energy and if you don’t eat, you don’t have any energy. And no energy leads to you being tired, so for the past couple of months, I’ve been really tired. And when I finally remember to eat, I’m so hungry it’s hard not to over eat.
Don’t panic. I haven’t gone off the deep end or anything. I’ve actually lost a little weight, but I don’t feel good. My energy is low and I need my energy because I need to work!
Moral of the story? Balance. We all need it. I have to learn that since I no longer have a set time to work, I have to place my own limits on myself. I have to set concrete working hours. Now, I’m not saying that I will only work 40 hours a week, because that is unrealistic for me and that type of boundary will only frustrate me. But I am saying that I will take breaks and take better care of myself and eat!
Until later…be blessed!
image from dreamstime.com