Off and On
One thing I’ve learned during this journey towards better heath: Compulsive Overeating is REAL.
I don’t think I really realized it until one evening when I was sitting on my sofa watching TV, or at least trying to watch it, because it was very hard for me to focus on what was going on on that screen. Inside my mind, the only thoughts were of eating something–anything. I wasn’t hungry or even stressed at the moment, but I really wanted to eat. I was compelled to eat. And so I ate and then I felt horrible about it. It then occured to me that there was more to this than I first thought.
Don’t get me wrong, I take full responsibility for my actions. I’m the one doing the eating. But there is something behind the desire. Something, that at times, feels like it’s beyond my control. That day I made a discoveryand a decision:
1. Dieting and exercising without understanding what’s really behind the overeating is like putting a bandaid over a gaping wound.
2. I have to find out what’s really behind the overeating–the compulsion.
So, I’ve signed up for counseling and I continue to pray for strength to stay on the wagon and stop the crazy cycle of climbing on…then falling off.
Right now, I feel motivated. I’ve been walking, modifying my diet. I have more energy and I’ve decided not to tell the people in my life who like to ridicule me about my new commitment to better health.
I’ll let you guys know how things go.
Pray for me, y’all.
Photo courtesy of sxc.hu